Friday, June 21, 2013

Letter to My 17-Year-Old-Self

Dear Laura,
 
I know your are lying in your bed, crying yourself to sleep, wondering what is to become of you. You are about 8 weeks pregnant. You have just told Mom and Dad, your family, and all your friends. To your surprise Mom and Dad still love you! And so does everyone else. You're wondering about Roger though and if he will continue to love you. You feel so alone right now. So unsure of your future. I hear you praying. That everything will be alright.
 
Guess what...God hears that prayer...and the many, many more that you will offer up over the years.
 
OK, so I'm gonna give you a sneak peak of your future.
 
First of all, that Roger guy, the father of that baby growing inside your stretching belly, he's NOT the one for you! Yes, he's that baby's father. That's it.
 
Secondly, even though they will tell you in a few weeks that you are carrying a baby girl.
DON'T BELIEVE THEM! It's a boy! The most amazing thing you will have ever laid your eyes on at 17 years old. You are definitely not going to know what you're doing as a mom, but you'll get it. You'll be really tired juggling everything, but you'll get it.
 
This is you. At 35 years old...18 years from tonight.
 
Yup, you've put on about 20 pounds. You are working on that! But you are also working on the fact that what you look like does NOT determine who you are. 
 
You may be wondering why I am writing to you tonight, of all nights...
We'll get to that!
 
Does this guy look familiar...?

Yes! That's Jeff. Jeff Schwab. Scott's friend. Well guess what? When your baby boy is about 11 months old Jeff is going to call and ask you out. Yes...out on a date. And on many more.
It's true! I swear! And tonight, as I write to you, you will have been married for 10 years!
 
You will marry Jeff on Saturday, June 21, 2003. The first day of Summer. The longest day of the year.
 
 You will date for A LONG TIME before you get married. Jeff will love your little boy as his own, but he'll be really scared about the responsibility entailed in marrying you and being a stepdad to that little guy. But he is going to be an amazing husband and father. Not only to the little boy growing inside you, but to 2 more children!
 
So be nice to him. Don't do things to push him away. And on that day when he tells you he's not sure about the two of you, have patience...it just means he takes it all very seriously.
 
You are going to have the wedding of your dreams and your little boy, OK I'll tell you...you're going to name him Dominic, is going to be a big part of that special day.
 
But let me tell you girl, it's not all about the dress and flowers and cake. Marriage can be tough. He's going to do things that drive you nuts! And well, you might be a little annoying sometimes as well. You and Jeff are going to go through some really, really hard times. I know it sounds scary and well to be honest, there will be times that you feel like you can't take another breath because you are in so much pain. But Jeff is going to be there along side of you through it all. And you will be there for him too when he needs it.
 
You will own a home together. And he will provide. He is a Godly man and the two of you will grow stronger through the years. Your faith in God, together, will grow too. And you will see time and time again that the Lord is with both of you, holding you in His arms through the good times and the bad, just as He is holding you right now.
 
You will thank God every day for bringing Jeff into your life and pray that He blesses you with many more years together. 
 
I could go on, but the story isn't complete yet. I don't know what the future holds. I just know that as long as you have this guy by your side...you will continue to be a better woman.
 
Hang in there. There's a lot of exciting times to come. Take the time to take a deep breath, soak it all in, because the time goes very, very fast.
 
 
Love,
Laura